Triggered: Justin Timberlake's Jail Time, Kanye's Boycott, and More

Triggered: Justin Timberlake's Jail Time, Kanye's Boycott, and More

Each week, writer Mathias Rosenzweig reflects on the events in pop culture that left him triggered.

Each week, writer Mathias Rosenzweig reflects on the events in pop culture that left him triggered.

Text: MATHIAS ROSENZWEIG

Illegally taking a selfie while voting for our next Prez may have won Justin Timberlake 30 days in the clink and a $50 fine. Only a matter of time until Trump blames this on Crooked Hillary. Sad! #TRIGGERED

Everyone gagged over the slutty devil/angel/playtex costume Mariah Carey wore to her one-week-early Halloween party. Sadly, it's clearly photoshopped—Mariah would never let someone as skinny as that skeleton be in the same picture as her. #TRIGGERED

Over the weekend, Scarlet Johansson and her French husband Romain Dauriac opened a gourmet popcorn shop in Paris. Get over yourself Jojo—my mom just bought me a microwave and I’m doing some pretty fancy shit, too. #TRIGGERED

Sunday’s episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians shows a clip in which Kim says, “Actually, I hate guns,” just weeks before being robbed at gunpoint. See how quickly Mama Kris gathers inspiration for a plotline?! #TRIGGERED

In more Kardashian news, Vivid Entertainment has turned Kim’s infamous sex tape into a virtual reality experience. “If this were up-to-date, it’d be more like Grand Theft Auto”– Paris Hilton, probably. #TRIGGERED

The Gilmore Girls revival trailer has arrived, and we get to hear Yale graduate Rory tell a swelteringly hot Milo Ventimiglia, “I’m feeling very lost these days. I have no job. I have no credit. I have no underwear.” We see what you’re doing with that last bit, Whory Gilmore. #TRIGGERED

Chris Martin brought his kids Apple and Moses onstage at a concert in Malibu, and they’re actually really, really talented performers. Looks like singers who aren’t children of celebrities should start consciously uncoupling themselves from dreams of pop stardom #TRIGGERED

Kanye West announced that he wouldn’t be attending the Grammys if Frank Ocean’s Blond weren’t nominated. I didn’t get invited, but let the record show that’s why I’m not going either. #TRIGGERED

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